I realise that I have been back in Canada now for almost a month and I have yet to update this here blog. I think it's partly to do with the fact that it is about my adventures in Singapore and that time is now over, and partly to do with the colossal feat I have been undertaking to create a life up from the ashes that were the remnants of my leaving.
However, I think I might be ready now to post my final thoughts about everything standing as I am now firmly on the ground and having had some time to get my head round the whole thing.
Upon arriving back here in Canada there were a few things that struck me. I think it's an interesting perspective to be able to have the experience of being a foreigner in your own land, if only for a few days while your mind switches channels. Seeing Canada from that perspective has been very interesting.
Here are the things I noticed the most:
White people all look the same
We have soooooo much sky here
The empathy that is entrenched in our culture permeates everything
After having talked with my friend Ash who lived in Ghana for a while, I have found out that this white people look the same thing is not unusual. For the first couple of days I was back, all of the people I saw looked like people I went to high school with or people that I went to university with. I think I'm just not used to seeing white people's facial features so they ping in my head as being familiar.
I never realised in Singapore how little you see of the sky as much as I did in my Dad's car driving down the QEW. Things here are so much flatter and you aren't surrounded on every side by towering buildings and you suddenly realise how big the sky really is. It was kind of like that first time you go up in an airplane and you go above the clouds and you realise that it's always sunny, it's just the cloud that block it out. If that makes any sense at all...
Finally, and I think most importantly, the empathy in our culture. Since coming back two surveys have been released that have said that Singaporean are both the least emotional and least happy people in the world. Now, whether that is really true or not is of course debatable, but I do find that there is a distinct lack of caring for others. Not to say that Singaporeans are jerks, they're not, it's just...they don't really seem to feel a lot of compassion. Canadians brim with it. Even in Toronto, where people are notoriously assholes, it is more common for people to return things when someone drops them, help someone up who has slipped and fallen, say hello to strangers or ask them how their day is, give money to people asking on the street and respond to marketing that speaks to your sympathy. All of these things I have seen and noticed since coming back and all of them are things I either rarely or never saw in Singapore. You kind of forget that it's out there in a way, but it's the hallmark of what makes this country my home I think.
I have also seen a few of my friends and I feel so overwhelmed at the caring, wonderful natures that they have. I truly have a community of people here that care and are caregivers, who nurture and love and take care of people as their job, or just as part of the very fabric of who they are. It's not just because we are Canadian, I think it's also just who we are, but man, it is good to be back in the warm, loving arms of my home.
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Goodbye
Today is the last day I will be in Singapore. It's not really sunk in yet and it still seems really surreal. I've said emotional goodbyes to my school and my friends and I'm almost ready to go. My single box for shipping has been picked up and most of the things on my to-do list are complete. Now it's just a question of packing the last pieces of my life and getting to the airport tomorrow morning.
It's been an amazing, painful, exciting and lonely time. I've made friends and lost friends, I've seen parts of the world I'd only dreamed of and I've learned a lot about myself and the world around me. I've grown into a teacher and I've challenged myself to the limit of what I thought I was possible of. I'm incredibly proud of the accomplishments I've made.
It's time to go home though. It will be cold, I will be poor, I'm sure I will be in culture shock for a while. But there's truly no place like home. I can't wait to see my friends again and be back in the warm community of home.
I'm grateful to the kindness people here have shown me, the acceptance I have found and the inner strength it's taken me to get this far. It doesn't seem real that I will be leaving soon, and I don't know if it will for a few days. It feels like one life is ending and another is starting and there is sadness and excitement with that.
For now, goodbye Singapore and thank you for everything. I have seen beautiful things, painful things and a whole new world here. I see change coming to Singapore and slowly things in the education system here are getting better. I truly believe that Singapore is going to make it to their vision one day and I hope that I get to visit so that I can see it.
It's been an amazing, painful, exciting and lonely time. I've made friends and lost friends, I've seen parts of the world I'd only dreamed of and I've learned a lot about myself and the world around me. I've grown into a teacher and I've challenged myself to the limit of what I thought I was possible of. I'm incredibly proud of the accomplishments I've made.
It's time to go home though. It will be cold, I will be poor, I'm sure I will be in culture shock for a while. But there's truly no place like home. I can't wait to see my friends again and be back in the warm community of home.
I'm grateful to the kindness people here have shown me, the acceptance I have found and the inner strength it's taken me to get this far. It doesn't seem real that I will be leaving soon, and I don't know if it will for a few days. It feels like one life is ending and another is starting and there is sadness and excitement with that.
For now, goodbye Singapore and thank you for everything. I have seen beautiful things, painful things and a whole new world here. I see change coming to Singapore and slowly things in the education system here are getting better. I truly believe that Singapore is going to make it to their vision one day and I hope that I get to visit so that I can see it.
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Japan
Look. I just don't think I have the writing prowess to accurately capture the sheer experience of Japan for you all. I would like to, I really would. But man, there is just so much that is... indescribable.
I think I've settled on giving you small glimpses into experiences and feelings I had while I was there in some attempt to give you a window into what it was like. So, I hope this kind of works. If not, I'm sorry.
-Flying on my own, exhilarating feeling of being truly free and alone, fragile, vulnerable, independent and like I've actually attained the feeling I longed for all those times I felt like packing it all in and just disappearing from the life I had. This is me, doing that shit for the next week.
-Landing in the completely foreign world of Japan, the language is completely different, feeling like I wish they were just speaking Chinese cause at least I understand some of that, realising how weird it is that I understand some Chinese now
-This feeling of floating through life like a bobber on the surface of a pond cause there's no meaning to assign to the things that would hold you here, in this place, in this moment. You can't read the signs, understand the announcements, figure out what the food on the menu in the picture is, what the street names are, what direction is up, down, or all around. All you can do is hope that you read enough about this place to get around, that the transit map you have is accurate and that the vague route you've charted for yourself on what seems like literally hundreds of subway lines is going to get you to the strange place with the different name that sounds like nothing you have a context for.
-Being ok, making it there, and feeling accomplished as fuck.
-Arriving in Shibuya, finding the crossing and feeling like there is this pulsing, throbbing, life coming up from the pavement through your shoes and into your blood
-People everywhere, lights flashing, music blaring, stores everywhere, red light, white light, a beautiful hustle, the world standing still while everyone waits for a light to change and then, suddenly, the explosion of hundreds of bodies throbbing out and across this intersection that looks like daylight from the neon beaming down on it
-Feeling like the other stuff I've done in Asia were the water wings to prepare me for Japan. Crossing the street with oncoming motos in Vietnam, listening to a million words in languages I don't know how to speak, zebra crossings, the subway lines in Hong Kong, China, Singapore, London, Malaysia, Toronto all coming together for this: the apotheosis of subway lines
-Constantly being struck by the sheer graciousness of the Japanese. People bowing to me, saying thank you in the politest ways, taking such good customer care of me that I feel like a queen, literally running in heels to pick up a computer printout for my Shinkansen ticket. Wanting not to compare these people to the people I've encountered in Singapore and China, but not being able to help feeling so damn impressed with the people of Japan
-Being awkward and unable to speak the language, feeling ashamed of myself daily for my intrusion and ignorance
-Walking through Harajuku, blaring music, insane colours then turning a corner into Meiji shrine and finding a peaceful, beautiful forest, with streams and trees and animals and birds and a beautiful, almost silent shrine that transcends religion
-Strolling through the gardens of the Imperial palace after finding my way through the concrete jungle to get there, being weirded out by the juxtaposition of the buildings in the background rising up above the beautiful, landscaped perfection of a Japanese garden, then falling in love with the possibilities of Tokyo
-Looking up and seeing layer after layer of humanity, highways, train tracks, office buildings, pedestrian walkways, elevators rising through the floors, signs peering out through the cracks and thinking how many layers of humanity you could find in Tokyo would fill a lifetime
-Shinkansen, going super fast, looking out at the beauty of the countryside, struck by how green everything is. Announcement: "No smoking will be allowed on this train...except for in the following cars:...." being fascinated with the culture of smoking here, there are designated smoking areas and you don't see anyone walking around and smoking out on the street, but smoking is allowed in almost every restaurant, hotel lobby and even on the train to Kyoto
-Kyoto, is almost too beautiful a place to describe for you
-When I got there, I felt depressed and lost because I didn't have a lonely plant book for it. Then I went to the tourism information and the world opened up for me. Funny how information is so essential to the enjoyment of a place for me
-Taking the bus everywhere, seeing temple, shrine, temple, shrine, bam bam bam bam, feeling like my eyes aren't enough to take in the beauty, the greenery, the fineness and grace and elegance involved in every leaf, bit of moss, carefully curving branch involved in these beautiful places
-Walking through Gion for hours, the strange dichotomy inside of not wanting to be a gawking white person looking at a culture through a glass pane, not wanting to feel like the Maiko who walked by me was an animal in the zoo for me to observe, but still having the uncontrollable fascination. Struggling with the feeling of being some sort of sanctimonious hipster prick for making judgments like that on people who are tourists when I am one myself, realising that this whole thing was stupid to be thinking about and probably the result of being alone with no one to talk to for days on days and days.
-Sushi and Japanese curry and beautiful light Japanese beers and loving sitting in restaurants and reading books and enjoying food and being completely on my own, selfish schedule that decides when and where and how I do things and not having to wait for anyone else to finish at a place, or having the feeling that I have to stay for long enough to seem to other people like I've truly appreciated a place
-Slaking my thirst for beauty like some sort of dazed drunkard, rushing from temple to temple and not taking more than half an hour at each because that's as long as I wanted to take, thanks
-Everything is beautiful. Even when its ugly. Feeling like I will break down and cry at the splendor of nature.
-Going into a hot spring and being naked with all of these Japanese ladies, feeling super out of place and trying not to look too much at the naked ladies, but needing to so that I know what the hell the protocol here is, cause the Lonely Planet said some stuff, but I still don't want to do some heinous, offensive, white people thing that will ruin the peace and tranquility of this strange naked people place. Feeling very pink.
I don't know. Maybe that's too much. Maybe it's not enough. I guess it sums up some of it.
And, I have lots and lots of pictures, here they are:
http://s1105.photobucket.com/albums/h343/Bea_Jolley/Japan%202012/
I think I've settled on giving you small glimpses into experiences and feelings I had while I was there in some attempt to give you a window into what it was like. So, I hope this kind of works. If not, I'm sorry.
-Flying on my own, exhilarating feeling of being truly free and alone, fragile, vulnerable, independent and like I've actually attained the feeling I longed for all those times I felt like packing it all in and just disappearing from the life I had. This is me, doing that shit for the next week.
-Landing in the completely foreign world of Japan, the language is completely different, feeling like I wish they were just speaking Chinese cause at least I understand some of that, realising how weird it is that I understand some Chinese now
-This feeling of floating through life like a bobber on the surface of a pond cause there's no meaning to assign to the things that would hold you here, in this place, in this moment. You can't read the signs, understand the announcements, figure out what the food on the menu in the picture is, what the street names are, what direction is up, down, or all around. All you can do is hope that you read enough about this place to get around, that the transit map you have is accurate and that the vague route you've charted for yourself on what seems like literally hundreds of subway lines is going to get you to the strange place with the different name that sounds like nothing you have a context for.
-Being ok, making it there, and feeling accomplished as fuck.
-Arriving in Shibuya, finding the crossing and feeling like there is this pulsing, throbbing, life coming up from the pavement through your shoes and into your blood
-People everywhere, lights flashing, music blaring, stores everywhere, red light, white light, a beautiful hustle, the world standing still while everyone waits for a light to change and then, suddenly, the explosion of hundreds of bodies throbbing out and across this intersection that looks like daylight from the neon beaming down on it
-Feeling like the other stuff I've done in Asia were the water wings to prepare me for Japan. Crossing the street with oncoming motos in Vietnam, listening to a million words in languages I don't know how to speak, zebra crossings, the subway lines in Hong Kong, China, Singapore, London, Malaysia, Toronto all coming together for this: the apotheosis of subway lines
-Constantly being struck by the sheer graciousness of the Japanese. People bowing to me, saying thank you in the politest ways, taking such good customer care of me that I feel like a queen, literally running in heels to pick up a computer printout for my Shinkansen ticket. Wanting not to compare these people to the people I've encountered in Singapore and China, but not being able to help feeling so damn impressed with the people of Japan
-Being awkward and unable to speak the language, feeling ashamed of myself daily for my intrusion and ignorance
-Walking through Harajuku, blaring music, insane colours then turning a corner into Meiji shrine and finding a peaceful, beautiful forest, with streams and trees and animals and birds and a beautiful, almost silent shrine that transcends religion
-Strolling through the gardens of the Imperial palace after finding my way through the concrete jungle to get there, being weirded out by the juxtaposition of the buildings in the background rising up above the beautiful, landscaped perfection of a Japanese garden, then falling in love with the possibilities of Tokyo
-Looking up and seeing layer after layer of humanity, highways, train tracks, office buildings, pedestrian walkways, elevators rising through the floors, signs peering out through the cracks and thinking how many layers of humanity you could find in Tokyo would fill a lifetime
-Shinkansen, going super fast, looking out at the beauty of the countryside, struck by how green everything is. Announcement: "No smoking will be allowed on this train...except for in the following cars:...." being fascinated with the culture of smoking here, there are designated smoking areas and you don't see anyone walking around and smoking out on the street, but smoking is allowed in almost every restaurant, hotel lobby and even on the train to Kyoto
-Kyoto, is almost too beautiful a place to describe for you
-When I got there, I felt depressed and lost because I didn't have a lonely plant book for it. Then I went to the tourism information and the world opened up for me. Funny how information is so essential to the enjoyment of a place for me
-Taking the bus everywhere, seeing temple, shrine, temple, shrine, bam bam bam bam, feeling like my eyes aren't enough to take in the beauty, the greenery, the fineness and grace and elegance involved in every leaf, bit of moss, carefully curving branch involved in these beautiful places
-Walking through Gion for hours, the strange dichotomy inside of not wanting to be a gawking white person looking at a culture through a glass pane, not wanting to feel like the Maiko who walked by me was an animal in the zoo for me to observe, but still having the uncontrollable fascination. Struggling with the feeling of being some sort of sanctimonious hipster prick for making judgments like that on people who are tourists when I am one myself, realising that this whole thing was stupid to be thinking about and probably the result of being alone with no one to talk to for days on days and days.
-Sushi and Japanese curry and beautiful light Japanese beers and loving sitting in restaurants and reading books and enjoying food and being completely on my own, selfish schedule that decides when and where and how I do things and not having to wait for anyone else to finish at a place, or having the feeling that I have to stay for long enough to seem to other people like I've truly appreciated a place
-Slaking my thirst for beauty like some sort of dazed drunkard, rushing from temple to temple and not taking more than half an hour at each because that's as long as I wanted to take, thanks
-Everything is beautiful. Even when its ugly. Feeling like I will break down and cry at the splendor of nature.
-Going into a hot spring and being naked with all of these Japanese ladies, feeling super out of place and trying not to look too much at the naked ladies, but needing to so that I know what the hell the protocol here is, cause the Lonely Planet said some stuff, but I still don't want to do some heinous, offensive, white people thing that will ruin the peace and tranquility of this strange naked people place. Feeling very pink.
I don't know. Maybe that's too much. Maybe it's not enough. I guess it sums up some of it.
And, I have lots and lots of pictures, here they are:
http://s1105.photobucket.com/albums/h343/Bea_Jolley/Japan%202012/
Saturday, September 1, 2012
Tokyo (The First Day)
My first night in Japan was good. I landed at Narita and managed to find the train station. I took a very futuristic train straight to Shibuya which is the area I am staying in. I walked out of the train station and came to terms with the fact that there was no way I could hope of navigating my way to my hotel from there so I accepted fate and hailed a cab. Thus began the Gong show I will call Talking to Japanese (In English). People are really patient and sweet and they talk to me in Japanese and I talk in English and we both giggle and mime our way through. I feel like an ignorant Westerner, which I am, but at least I kind of know my Asia, so I feel much more prepared for Tokyo at night than I would have a year ago.
Found the hotel, it is very cute. It`s a little boutique hotel and my room is adorable and tiny. The toilet has a permanently heated seat and an automatic flusher and all sorts of bidet functions I dont want to explore for fear of the fact that one of them I think is some sort of enema. I just hope I dont hit the wrong button in a stupour one night and get more than Id bargained for.
I went out exploring Shibuya and it took me a while to find Shibuya crossing, but when I did, holy pants. Its the place you always see int he movies of Japan, with the insane flashing lights and videos blaring commercials and thousands of people crossing the street. It is beautiful and crazy and everything I had hoped it would be.
Some young guy took my hand while I was crossing the street and told me I was very beautiful and that he loved me. I laughed and laughed and showed him pictures of Ben on my phone. I used my translator to say that he doesnt know me so he cant possibly love me but he insisted that I smell good and I am a genius. I think these are some of the only English words he knew. I laughed and laughed and then wandered away while he was on the phone.
I had an awesome Shiatsu massage that was the perfect thing for just having got off a 7 hour plane ride and went home to bed. It is raining a lot here right now so I`m trying to think what to do with myself. I want to see some sumo and the Imperial Palace and do some shopping. Harajuku is supposed to be awesome on Sunday nights so I think I am going to head there tonight. I dont know why Sunday night but I`ll let you know and get back to you.
Essentially, I feel like the other places I`ve travelled in Asia have prepared me in slow steps for Japan. My friend Kelli said that she has felt like Japan is real Asia, like dark, totally different, inaccessible Asia and she`s right in a way. But I think that it all comes together to make sense here.
Coming here on my own in some ways is more scary than it was to go to Singapore because Singaporeans speak English and there was someone there on the other side to meet me. That being said, its one of the most exciting things Ive ever done and Im so glad I have. This is certainly one of those things I will have in my heart, a memory that will last until my inevitable strokes wipe them out.
More to come, also, I would like you all to notice that I have sorted out this Japanese keyboard and that there are no kanji characters at all. I am a goddess of sorting stuff out.
Sunday, August 26, 2012
Survival: More Than Just a Play Title
This Friday my Drama students performed their production, Survival. It was based on The Hunger Games and The Lottery and it was my first school production as a teacher rather than a student.
It has been a long journey getting there and a super stressful one at that. We had issues with our trainers, with our script and at times our club's organisation. In the midst of these last weeks of essential preparation I have been an Oral Examiner for the O Level exams, so I have been out of school every afternoon with that.
In spite of everything, the kids did a fantastic job. Last year when we did the Singapore Youth Festival it was fun but there were only judges and teachers in the audience. This was the first time I've seen my students through to the end, with their parents and friends in the audience cheering and slapping. Seeing my students come through and do an awesome job was such a rewarding feeling. I am so proud of them, and just thinking about what they were like last year when I started and what they can do on stage now brings a tear to my eye.
If I ever needed confirmation that I'm doing the right thing by leaving and going to find a job teaching drama, this was it. The high you get from watching your kids on stage and seeing them come through is like nothing else.
I am so exhausted from this week that I just feel like sleeping forever, but I have to go back tomorrow and continue the Oral Exams. The exciting thing is that on Saturday I fly out to Japan for the week and I have just booked my hotels and my flights and everything is set.
I'm super excited about going and seeing a country I have dreamt about since I was a little girl. I will make sure to take loads of pictures and write to you all when I'm back about the crazy stuff I've seen and eaten.
It has been a long journey getting there and a super stressful one at that. We had issues with our trainers, with our script and at times our club's organisation. In the midst of these last weeks of essential preparation I have been an Oral Examiner for the O Level exams, so I have been out of school every afternoon with that.
In spite of everything, the kids did a fantastic job. Last year when we did the Singapore Youth Festival it was fun but there were only judges and teachers in the audience. This was the first time I've seen my students through to the end, with their parents and friends in the audience cheering and slapping. Seeing my students come through and do an awesome job was such a rewarding feeling. I am so proud of them, and just thinking about what they were like last year when I started and what they can do on stage now brings a tear to my eye.
If I ever needed confirmation that I'm doing the right thing by leaving and going to find a job teaching drama, this was it. The high you get from watching your kids on stage and seeing them come through is like nothing else.
I am so exhausted from this week that I just feel like sleeping forever, but I have to go back tomorrow and continue the Oral Exams. The exciting thing is that on Saturday I fly out to Japan for the week and I have just booked my hotels and my flights and everything is set.
I'm super excited about going and seeing a country I have dreamt about since I was a little girl. I will make sure to take loads of pictures and write to you all when I'm back about the crazy stuff I've seen and eaten.
Monday, August 13, 2012
Kuala Lumpur
Hello blog beauties!!
I apologise for the odd lack of punctuation that is sure to be included in this here post, I did the thing where I hit some keys that made the punctuation turn Spanish or something and Im frankly too lazy to suss out how to fix it, so imagine that there is punctuation aplenty on this here post and we ll be all good.
This weekend Kyla, Kelli and I did a small getaway to KL, having not been there before and reckoning that a cheapie trip would be a good plan. Its only about an hours flight from Singapore and I got my flight there for $36 so why not(question mark)
Kyla had planned to go to KL before we said we would come with and she had found a sweet deal on a room at the InterContinental, which by the way, if you are going to KL, you should for sure hit up. The breakfast at that place seriously blew my mind. They had everything delicious you could ever want for breakfast, and then lots of other stuff too. Dim sum, samosas, pancakes, brie, hasbrowns, fresh sqweezed juice, smoked salmon, curry chicken. South East Asia is seriously food heaven, and this breakfast was the epicentre.
We went to check out the Batu Caves, which are seriously amazing and you should go check that out if you are there. There is a beautiful Hindu temple, with the worlds largest statue and biggest Hindu temple outside of India. Also, about 300 steps and a whole lotta monkeys.
We also did the Dark Cave tour which was amazing, we got to go into this huge bat cave and see all sorts of creature (such as terrifying centipedes and cockroaches, now that I think about it, Im not sure why I thought this thing was fun) and it was fascinating.
Some cool things: The trains has ladies-only cars which was an oddly empowering feeling. You are in a train car and its just you and other ladies, no creepos leering at your bodoacious, sweaty, sunburnt Western harlotry, just sisters chillin.
Travelling with lady friends is a fun and cool experience, it is liberating and wonderful. We hung out and watched the Olympics, gawking at the male divers and generally laughing to the point of pain. (At least I worked my abs, to help counteract that breakfast...)
Also, Kelli sleep walks into places like my bed or the window. It is kind of hilarious.
If you want to see some seriously beautiful caves (and asshole monkeys) you can check out my pictures at Photobuck here: http://s1105.photobucket.com/albums/h343/Bea_Jolley/Facebook/National%20Day%202012%20KL%20Edition/
Next month is going to be Japan, which I have the squees about.
I was feeling all apprehensive about travelling alone and I was all like, I never travelled alone before...until I reminded myself that I got on a plane to bloody Singapore! On my own! Without ever having been to Asia and knowing no one on the other side! And I went to Improv camp in Regina when I was 16, also on my own. So, what exactly was I feeling weird about again (QM)
I will be sure to write lots about my trip to Japan because hotdiggity its going to be awesome. I want to do so many things a week might not be enough but I want to:
-go to the hotsprings
-watch a sumo match (luckily they happen in September)
-see kabuki or noh theatre
-ride the bullet train
-eat my face off
-shop in Harajuku
-visit the teahouses of Gion
-see the Shinjuku lights
-get a shiatsu massage
-buy cool stuff that I wouldnt get anywhere else
I will let you know how many of the super fantastic things on this list I end up doing.
I apologise for the odd lack of punctuation that is sure to be included in this here post, I did the thing where I hit some keys that made the punctuation turn Spanish or something and Im frankly too lazy to suss out how to fix it, so imagine that there is punctuation aplenty on this here post and we ll be all good.
This weekend Kyla, Kelli and I did a small getaway to KL, having not been there before and reckoning that a cheapie trip would be a good plan. Its only about an hours flight from Singapore and I got my flight there for $36 so why not(question mark)
Kyla had planned to go to KL before we said we would come with and she had found a sweet deal on a room at the InterContinental, which by the way, if you are going to KL, you should for sure hit up. The breakfast at that place seriously blew my mind. They had everything delicious you could ever want for breakfast, and then lots of other stuff too. Dim sum, samosas, pancakes, brie, hasbrowns, fresh sqweezed juice, smoked salmon, curry chicken. South East Asia is seriously food heaven, and this breakfast was the epicentre.
We went to check out the Batu Caves, which are seriously amazing and you should go check that out if you are there. There is a beautiful Hindu temple, with the worlds largest statue and biggest Hindu temple outside of India. Also, about 300 steps and a whole lotta monkeys.
We also did the Dark Cave tour which was amazing, we got to go into this huge bat cave and see all sorts of creature (such as terrifying centipedes and cockroaches, now that I think about it, Im not sure why I thought this thing was fun) and it was fascinating.
Some cool things: The trains has ladies-only cars which was an oddly empowering feeling. You are in a train car and its just you and other ladies, no creepos leering at your bodoacious, sweaty, sunburnt Western harlotry, just sisters chillin.
Travelling with lady friends is a fun and cool experience, it is liberating and wonderful. We hung out and watched the Olympics, gawking at the male divers and generally laughing to the point of pain. (At least I worked my abs, to help counteract that breakfast...)
Also, Kelli sleep walks into places like my bed or the window. It is kind of hilarious.
If you want to see some seriously beautiful caves (and asshole monkeys) you can check out my pictures at Photobuck here: http://s1105.photobucket.com/albums/h343/Bea_Jolley/Facebook/National%20Day%202012%20KL%20Edition/
Next month is going to be Japan, which I have the squees about.
I was feeling all apprehensive about travelling alone and I was all like, I never travelled alone before...until I reminded myself that I got on a plane to bloody Singapore! On my own! Without ever having been to Asia and knowing no one on the other side! And I went to Improv camp in Regina when I was 16, also on my own. So, what exactly was I feeling weird about again (QM)
I will be sure to write lots about my trip to Japan because hotdiggity its going to be awesome. I want to do so many things a week might not be enough but I want to:
-go to the hotsprings
-watch a sumo match (luckily they happen in September)
-see kabuki or noh theatre
-ride the bullet train
-eat my face off
-shop in Harajuku
-visit the teahouses of Gion
-see the Shinjuku lights
-get a shiatsu massage
-buy cool stuff that I wouldnt get anywhere else
I will let you know how many of the super fantastic things on this list I end up doing.
Monday, July 30, 2012
Oh Canada!
I apologise for my recent lack of posts. Also, the insane state of my spelling these days. It's become a hodge podge of British and Canadian and I just frankly don't know how anything is spelled (spelt?) at this point. So bear with me friends!
I haven't posted as a result of a sort of paralysis that set in for a while of indecision. In June my initial contract here ended and I was offered a renewal. I made the choice to renew it, but also give notice that I would finish out the school year. After that, who knew?
I have made the choice to go back to Canada. The great thing about airplanes is that they go more than one way and I think that what I need is to go back to my roots, and the family I call friends, and the people and country that I love so that I can get my head on straight and my shit sorted out.
My end life goal is to be back home, so I figure why not start now.
The thing about Singapore is that life here is incredibly easy. You don't even realise how clean and efficient things are until you go somewhere else and you find yourself horrified at how hard it is to use public transport, or that there is litter on the street.
Life in Singapore is also never changing. That might sound weird for a vibrant, fast paced Asian nation, but it feels true to me. I feel that in many ways I've been in some sort of a dream and it doesn't feel like it's been my real life I've been living. The sun rises and sets at 7 every day, 365 days a year. The sun is almost always out, or it's raining. The temperature doesn't change and it just keeps going. It's wildly safe, and clean and feels like some sort of bubble.
These things are all great. I had a discussion the other day about how my students have no conception of racism. They say horrible things sometimes because they honestly don't really get what oppression is or how terribly it hurts. I feel like if the worst problem we face with our kids is that they don't understand suffering, then Lee Kuan Yew has done one hell of a job.
That being said, the artist in me (not to sound pretentious and all fancy-pantsed, my artistry is some sort of combination of ruminating on the Internet and busting it out on stage) feels as though she has been trapped in stasis. I feel like the person I am in my heart hasn't really had much of a chance to shine here. I miss theatre, live music, Canadian manners and poutine.
I know that going back will be fraught with its own set of challenges and that at some point I will find myself poor, cold and cranky in the dead of winter, cursing the greyness of it all wondering why on earth I left this tropical paradise on the equator. But I guess the reason is soul.
I'm not saying I won't come back, or find my way to another overseas teaching opportunity at some point. My heart still burns for London, but for now, I think the best course of action is to enjoy the time I have left here and to go back home and get my head on straight.
It's funny, but going home feels like the scarier option. What a state we are in that being in home base seems more terrifying than living on the other side of the planet. But it is. I think going back is going to take some balls (or ova, which we all know I have in spades).
Canada. I miss you. I miss my loves, my friends, my family. I miss my country, my streets, my culture. I miss manners, and customer service and art.
In this year and a half, I've had opportunities I could never have dreamed of. I've had grown up income, I've learned how to dress like a woman, appreciate insane fashion, keep my mouth shut (that's a tough one for me by the way), live truly on my own, cope with lonliness, be a real teacher, accept other cultures, cope with 12 hour flights like a boss. I've been motorcycling through Saigon, sunbathing in Hong Kong, swimming in Indonesia, rangering teens in Malaysia, dancing in London, eating in Singapore, exploring in Beijing. I've pushed myself to the limit and found that I can do this. But just because I can, doesn't mean I have to.
I've done myself proud, and I'm eternally grateful for the experiences I've had. And I can't wait to touch down on home soil again and hug the stuffing out of the people who matter most in my life.
I haven't posted as a result of a sort of paralysis that set in for a while of indecision. In June my initial contract here ended and I was offered a renewal. I made the choice to renew it, but also give notice that I would finish out the school year. After that, who knew?
I have made the choice to go back to Canada. The great thing about airplanes is that they go more than one way and I think that what I need is to go back to my roots, and the family I call friends, and the people and country that I love so that I can get my head on straight and my shit sorted out.
My end life goal is to be back home, so I figure why not start now.
The thing about Singapore is that life here is incredibly easy. You don't even realise how clean and efficient things are until you go somewhere else and you find yourself horrified at how hard it is to use public transport, or that there is litter on the street.
Life in Singapore is also never changing. That might sound weird for a vibrant, fast paced Asian nation, but it feels true to me. I feel that in many ways I've been in some sort of a dream and it doesn't feel like it's been my real life I've been living. The sun rises and sets at 7 every day, 365 days a year. The sun is almost always out, or it's raining. The temperature doesn't change and it just keeps going. It's wildly safe, and clean and feels like some sort of bubble.
These things are all great. I had a discussion the other day about how my students have no conception of racism. They say horrible things sometimes because they honestly don't really get what oppression is or how terribly it hurts. I feel like if the worst problem we face with our kids is that they don't understand suffering, then Lee Kuan Yew has done one hell of a job.
That being said, the artist in me (not to sound pretentious and all fancy-pantsed, my artistry is some sort of combination of ruminating on the Internet and busting it out on stage) feels as though she has been trapped in stasis. I feel like the person I am in my heart hasn't really had much of a chance to shine here. I miss theatre, live music, Canadian manners and poutine.
I know that going back will be fraught with its own set of challenges and that at some point I will find myself poor, cold and cranky in the dead of winter, cursing the greyness of it all wondering why on earth I left this tropical paradise on the equator. But I guess the reason is soul.
I'm not saying I won't come back, or find my way to another overseas teaching opportunity at some point. My heart still burns for London, but for now, I think the best course of action is to enjoy the time I have left here and to go back home and get my head on straight.
It's funny, but going home feels like the scarier option. What a state we are in that being in home base seems more terrifying than living on the other side of the planet. But it is. I think going back is going to take some balls (or ova, which we all know I have in spades).
Canada. I miss you. I miss my loves, my friends, my family. I miss my country, my streets, my culture. I miss manners, and customer service and art.
In this year and a half, I've had opportunities I could never have dreamed of. I've had grown up income, I've learned how to dress like a woman, appreciate insane fashion, keep my mouth shut (that's a tough one for me by the way), live truly on my own, cope with lonliness, be a real teacher, accept other cultures, cope with 12 hour flights like a boss. I've been motorcycling through Saigon, sunbathing in Hong Kong, swimming in Indonesia, rangering teens in Malaysia, dancing in London, eating in Singapore, exploring in Beijing. I've pushed myself to the limit and found that I can do this. But just because I can, doesn't mean I have to.
I've done myself proud, and I'm eternally grateful for the experiences I've had. And I can't wait to touch down on home soil again and hug the stuffing out of the people who matter most in my life.
Saturday, June 23, 2012
One
Well, Ben's back in Canada. He left on Thursday morning in a pile of tears at Changi Airport and so ended the six months of awesome times we had living here in Singapore again and begins Chapter 1,000 of Long Distance Relationship: Bea and Ben Edition.
I knew it was coming from the day he got here, but man did it suck. I've tried doing the grateful for him being here, positivity, sunshine and flowers thing, but sometimes you have to be authentic and say, this sucks some ass.
Since my first boyfriend when I was 16, I've shown myself to be one of those all or nothing types. Even when I try to be all independent and aloof, it only works for a little while. When I love someone, I really, really love them and it's true with Ben. It's really really hard for me to be away from him and also just to face being alone again. Without Iain here, I feel like I'm just about on my own here in Singapore.
Of course, that's the maudlin, teenaged kind of response and when I look at the reality, I have some really lovely people here in Singapore who care about me. Kyla and Matt have been awesome about keeping me busy and my roomates have invited me for Dim Sum breakfast today. I always feel all emo and alone right before people come along that I wouldn't expect and offer me some support and kindness.
So I'm going to try my best to just pick myself up and try not to be too upset about it. I'll be home in 6 months and the reality is that this long distance thing is probably going to be our reality for a while. The job market for teachers in Ontario isn't looking any brighter from what I've been hearing and I'm going to continue to look for job in England and at International Schools, so the reality is that this might continue for a while.
I just have to know that I'm a really lucky person because I have someone awesome that loves me, who was willing to come to Asia for 6 months to be with me and who is a rockstar at speaking Mandarin (and will get into fights with jerks in Mandarin on my behalf) and who is going to be a University student in the Fall, and that I am just really damn proud of. Oh, he also goes on upsidedown roller coasters, so he's kind of a big deal. Just so you know.
I knew it was coming from the day he got here, but man did it suck. I've tried doing the grateful for him being here, positivity, sunshine and flowers thing, but sometimes you have to be authentic and say, this sucks some ass.
Since my first boyfriend when I was 16, I've shown myself to be one of those all or nothing types. Even when I try to be all independent and aloof, it only works for a little while. When I love someone, I really, really love them and it's true with Ben. It's really really hard for me to be away from him and also just to face being alone again. Without Iain here, I feel like I'm just about on my own here in Singapore.
Of course, that's the maudlin, teenaged kind of response and when I look at the reality, I have some really lovely people here in Singapore who care about me. Kyla and Matt have been awesome about keeping me busy and my roomates have invited me for Dim Sum breakfast today. I always feel all emo and alone right before people come along that I wouldn't expect and offer me some support and kindness.
So I'm going to try my best to just pick myself up and try not to be too upset about it. I'll be home in 6 months and the reality is that this long distance thing is probably going to be our reality for a while. The job market for teachers in Ontario isn't looking any brighter from what I've been hearing and I'm going to continue to look for job in England and at International Schools, so the reality is that this might continue for a while.
I just have to know that I'm a really lucky person because I have someone awesome that loves me, who was willing to come to Asia for 6 months to be with me and who is a rockstar at speaking Mandarin (and will get into fights with jerks in Mandarin on my behalf) and who is going to be a University student in the Fall, and that I am just really damn proud of. Oh, he also goes on upsidedown roller coasters, so he's kind of a big deal. Just so you know.
Friday, June 15, 2012
Vietnam: Ho Chi Minh City
We just got back from Vietnam last night, and it was a great trip. I'm really glad we did it.
It was a nightmare getting started, from the deal.com fandango to the visa fiasco, it felt like the universe was standing in the way of us getting onto that plane. But, once we were in Ho Chi Minh city I started having a lot of fun.
An American friend of mine recommended that I read Vietnam: An Oral Biography before we went because honestly, I didn't know shit about Vietnam or the war. That books was a great thing to read, it gave me an idea about the conflict from so many perspectives and I understood so much more when we did things like go to the War Remnants Museum and go to the Reunification Palace and the Cu Chi tunnels.
I loved the moto culture, there were constant motorcycles buzzing around everywhere you went, crossing the street you look out for motos and you just go, they move around you and you do your best to move around them. The cars are like guests on the streets because they are mainly owned by the motos. No one seems to go too fast on them, Ben rented one and we went about 30 km/h most of the time, but you still can get around really easily on them. We saw people carrying massive loads of things on their bikes that you would think would be physically impossible.
It also wouldn't be Vietnam without lots and lots of prostitutes, it made me feel sort of ashamed of our Western men. There are so many "Beauty Salons" with hordes of scantily clad women in high heels waiting for a man to come along. It makes me sad that they are forced usually by economic circumstances into a life of servicing depraved, desperate men from the West. I think it's a huge industry and something that is rather gross about our culture that spills over into theirs.
It was also strange to be in this communist country that blocks Facebook and doesn't have McDonald's or Starbucks, but there is still Coke everywhere and the people are calling out to you in English to come into their restaurants where they have Italian, Mexican. American, French, Vietnamese and Chinese food all on the menu.
I guess that's the product of globalization and a people who will do anything to survive, including live in the tiniest, most claustrphobic underground tunnels you can imagine for weeks at a time to make it.
I think this trip has been my favorite Asian trip, I loved just walking down the streets in Vietnam and riding on the moto with Ben through the night is a memory I will have for the rest of my life. I guess it just goes to show you that it's not always the trips that you think will be good that turn out like that, sometimes it's a surprise but it's just what you needed.
My photos are here: http://s1105.photobucket.com/albums/h343/Bea_Jolley/Facebook/Vietnam%202012%20Ho%20Chi%20Minh%20City/
It was a nightmare getting started, from the deal.com fandango to the visa fiasco, it felt like the universe was standing in the way of us getting onto that plane. But, once we were in Ho Chi Minh city I started having a lot of fun.
An American friend of mine recommended that I read Vietnam: An Oral Biography before we went because honestly, I didn't know shit about Vietnam or the war. That books was a great thing to read, it gave me an idea about the conflict from so many perspectives and I understood so much more when we did things like go to the War Remnants Museum and go to the Reunification Palace and the Cu Chi tunnels.
I loved the moto culture, there were constant motorcycles buzzing around everywhere you went, crossing the street you look out for motos and you just go, they move around you and you do your best to move around them. The cars are like guests on the streets because they are mainly owned by the motos. No one seems to go too fast on them, Ben rented one and we went about 30 km/h most of the time, but you still can get around really easily on them. We saw people carrying massive loads of things on their bikes that you would think would be physically impossible.
It also wouldn't be Vietnam without lots and lots of prostitutes, it made me feel sort of ashamed of our Western men. There are so many "Beauty Salons" with hordes of scantily clad women in high heels waiting for a man to come along. It makes me sad that they are forced usually by economic circumstances into a life of servicing depraved, desperate men from the West. I think it's a huge industry and something that is rather gross about our culture that spills over into theirs.
It was also strange to be in this communist country that blocks Facebook and doesn't have McDonald's or Starbucks, but there is still Coke everywhere and the people are calling out to you in English to come into their restaurants where they have Italian, Mexican. American, French, Vietnamese and Chinese food all on the menu.
I guess that's the product of globalization and a people who will do anything to survive, including live in the tiniest, most claustrphobic underground tunnels you can imagine for weeks at a time to make it.
I think this trip has been my favorite Asian trip, I loved just walking down the streets in Vietnam and riding on the moto with Ben through the night is a memory I will have for the rest of my life. I guess it just goes to show you that it's not always the trips that you think will be good that turn out like that, sometimes it's a surprise but it's just what you needed.
My photos are here: http://s1105.photobucket.com/albums/h343/Bea_Jolley/Facebook/Vietnam%202012%20Ho%20Chi%20Minh%20City/
Sunday, June 3, 2012
Vietnam
Wow, I am not enjoying the new Blogger, but change is the only constant so what are ya gonna do?
I again haven't written in a while and I'm sorry, I think the shiny newness of living in Asia wore off a long time ago so the need to write about my experiences has dwindled as the new ones ceased happening.
Ben is still here, he is leaving to return home at the end of the month and that is all kinds of crappy. I know that he needs to go back to keep his life going but I will miss him a lot and going back to long distance relationship hell is not my idea of a good time.
Before he goes back we are planning to go to Vietnam for a few days on what was supposed to be a cheap and easy vacation booked through deal.com, but has ended up being somewhat costly and hassle-y but that's what you get sometimes when you think you're getting a deal and I'm choosing to look forward to the experience and not bitch about it too much.
We have done a bunch of things here in Singapore in the last few months that I had yet to do, such as going to Universal Studios at Sentosa which was fun. The last thing I've always wanted to do and haven't got around to doing yet is going to the Botanic Gardens, which I hope we manage to do before he goes back.
Generally, I've been working lots and looking into teaching prospects for the new year. There is supposed to be an International Teaching Fair in Bangkok in November so I'm going to research that, I am also working with an agency in the UK that hires Canadian teachers to work over there but so far I've been rather underwhelmed with their ability to communicate with me/get me jobs as promised so we'll see what happens there. England is still something I would really love to do for a while, but if I could get a good position at an International school I think that would be fantastic right now. International schools in general seem to be a really good match for my teaching style and teaching philosophy and the chance to work in a context with so much diversity would be really interesting and challenging to me which interests me. But, we'll see. Only time will tell where I end up next.
I am still dead-set on travelling to Japan, Ben and I couldn't manage to make it work while he was here but I am shooting for going in September now I think when I get a term holiday. Either way, I really want to make that happen before I go back to Canada.
Aside from a trip to Batam, Indonesia which you can get to by ferry from Singapore and another day trip into Malaysia with my school for a staff bowling day, there has not been much to write home about. Which I suppose is a good thing.
I'll keep y'all posted and write about my trip to Ho Chi Minh.
I again haven't written in a while and I'm sorry, I think the shiny newness of living in Asia wore off a long time ago so the need to write about my experiences has dwindled as the new ones ceased happening.
Ben is still here, he is leaving to return home at the end of the month and that is all kinds of crappy. I know that he needs to go back to keep his life going but I will miss him a lot and going back to long distance relationship hell is not my idea of a good time.
Before he goes back we are planning to go to Vietnam for a few days on what was supposed to be a cheap and easy vacation booked through deal.com, but has ended up being somewhat costly and hassle-y but that's what you get sometimes when you think you're getting a deal and I'm choosing to look forward to the experience and not bitch about it too much.
We have done a bunch of things here in Singapore in the last few months that I had yet to do, such as going to Universal Studios at Sentosa which was fun. The last thing I've always wanted to do and haven't got around to doing yet is going to the Botanic Gardens, which I hope we manage to do before he goes back.
Generally, I've been working lots and looking into teaching prospects for the new year. There is supposed to be an International Teaching Fair in Bangkok in November so I'm going to research that, I am also working with an agency in the UK that hires Canadian teachers to work over there but so far I've been rather underwhelmed with their ability to communicate with me/get me jobs as promised so we'll see what happens there. England is still something I would really love to do for a while, but if I could get a good position at an International school I think that would be fantastic right now. International schools in general seem to be a really good match for my teaching style and teaching philosophy and the chance to work in a context with so much diversity would be really interesting and challenging to me which interests me. But, we'll see. Only time will tell where I end up next.
I am still dead-set on travelling to Japan, Ben and I couldn't manage to make it work while he was here but I am shooting for going in September now I think when I get a term holiday. Either way, I really want to make that happen before I go back to Canada.
Aside from a trip to Batam, Indonesia which you can get to by ferry from Singapore and another day trip into Malaysia with my school for a staff bowling day, there has not been much to write home about. Which I suppose is a good thing.
I'll keep y'all posted and write about my trip to Ho Chi Minh.
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Hello dear blog.
It's been a while, and for that I apologise. I've been agonising over the decision about what to do next. This week I got my contract renewal offer for Singapore with a window of only 5 days to decide what to do, so I'm sure you can imagine there has been a lot of angst.
On one hand, a big part of me wants to finally be able to go home. I miss Canada, and my friends and my family. I miss my country and Shopper's Drug Mart and poutine. I have been growing increasingly more fong of the idea of being able to spend a summer at home and to be able to take the plane trip home with Ben in June when his course ends. However, pragmatism has won over idealism. (I know, this doesn't sound much like me.)
Working and teaching in Singapore has been a fantastic opportunity for my first teaching year. If I'd stayed home, I would have spent this year in all likelihood battling it out for supply teaching, or LTOs, and more than likely still working at Starbucks and hating my life.
Instead, I've had the experience of living in Asia, as well as the chance to travel to Hong Kong, Malaysia, China, England and Indonesia as well as of course, Singapore. I've also been able to have a mentor and the benefit of being in the Skilled Teacher program that has taught me so many valuable teaching skills to better my pedagogy and manage my classrooms.
The few things that are really missing for me are of course being home and being able to teach drama. Which is what I started out this whole teaching thing to do in the first place.
That all being said, I know I have mentioned before that I am looking to England to be my next move. However, I don't have a position there yet as the main hiring round for September happens in May.
I've decided to finish out this school year. I don't like starting something and not seeing it through and I've done so much work already with my Drama students for their production this year, and with my form class as well as my subject classes that a part of me would not feel right about leaving.
Also, the idea of leaving a job without having a new one to replace it just seems silly in this economy. I put my hopes on England once before and I was let down, sorely. I'm coming at it again this time with more experience and hopefully more to recommend me for a position as well as the experience of living abroad.
So, it looks like I will be in Singapore until December, unless a wonderful job in England comes my way that starts in September. This means that in June when Ben leaves, I will not be on the plane with him.
It was incredibly hard living here without him before and I think it will be even more painful having had the chance to share 6 months together and then to go back to it.
But, I'm nothing if not strong and I've got some good friends here. I also want to take as many opportunities to travel in Asia as I can with the time that I have left.
I will of course keep you all posted on how things develop. I wish I could be writing some inspiring missive about how I'm going for my dreams and taking a leap, but everyone I talk to who's working in teaching tells me to hold on to any position I have like grim death and I'm inclined to agree with them. Maybe being an adult means having to do things like this, but hey, I have a good job in a great country so I really shouldn't complain about staying for a while longer, right?
Next step, plan a trip to Batam for the weekend again because there's a lovely beach resort I went to with some friends that Ben and I are going to return to for the upcoming long weekend, and plan a trip to Japan for Ben and I before he goes back to Canada in June. At least there's that to look forward to, and really, how many people can say that?
It's been a while, and for that I apologise. I've been agonising over the decision about what to do next. This week I got my contract renewal offer for Singapore with a window of only 5 days to decide what to do, so I'm sure you can imagine there has been a lot of angst.
On one hand, a big part of me wants to finally be able to go home. I miss Canada, and my friends and my family. I miss my country and Shopper's Drug Mart and poutine. I have been growing increasingly more fong of the idea of being able to spend a summer at home and to be able to take the plane trip home with Ben in June when his course ends. However, pragmatism has won over idealism. (I know, this doesn't sound much like me.)
Working and teaching in Singapore has been a fantastic opportunity for my first teaching year. If I'd stayed home, I would have spent this year in all likelihood battling it out for supply teaching, or LTOs, and more than likely still working at Starbucks and hating my life.
Instead, I've had the experience of living in Asia, as well as the chance to travel to Hong Kong, Malaysia, China, England and Indonesia as well as of course, Singapore. I've also been able to have a mentor and the benefit of being in the Skilled Teacher program that has taught me so many valuable teaching skills to better my pedagogy and manage my classrooms.
The few things that are really missing for me are of course being home and being able to teach drama. Which is what I started out this whole teaching thing to do in the first place.
That all being said, I know I have mentioned before that I am looking to England to be my next move. However, I don't have a position there yet as the main hiring round for September happens in May.
I've decided to finish out this school year. I don't like starting something and not seeing it through and I've done so much work already with my Drama students for their production this year, and with my form class as well as my subject classes that a part of me would not feel right about leaving.
Also, the idea of leaving a job without having a new one to replace it just seems silly in this economy. I put my hopes on England once before and I was let down, sorely. I'm coming at it again this time with more experience and hopefully more to recommend me for a position as well as the experience of living abroad.
So, it looks like I will be in Singapore until December, unless a wonderful job in England comes my way that starts in September. This means that in June when Ben leaves, I will not be on the plane with him.
It was incredibly hard living here without him before and I think it will be even more painful having had the chance to share 6 months together and then to go back to it.
But, I'm nothing if not strong and I've got some good friends here. I also want to take as many opportunities to travel in Asia as I can with the time that I have left.
I will of course keep you all posted on how things develop. I wish I could be writing some inspiring missive about how I'm going for my dreams and taking a leap, but everyone I talk to who's working in teaching tells me to hold on to any position I have like grim death and I'm inclined to agree with them. Maybe being an adult means having to do things like this, but hey, I have a good job in a great country so I really shouldn't complain about staying for a while longer, right?
Next step, plan a trip to Batam for the weekend again because there's a lovely beach resort I went to with some friends that Ben and I are going to return to for the upcoming long weekend, and plan a trip to Japan for Ben and I before he goes back to Canada in June. At least there's that to look forward to, and really, how many people can say that?
Sunday, March 25, 2012
China and Malaysia
This month I had the chance to travel to both China and Malaysia, so I figure I ought to write about both experiences.
First, Ben and I decided to go to China for a few days over my term break because he's wanted to go back since he left and I've always wanted to see China, especially since knowing Ben and hearing him talk about it so passionately. We decided to go to Beijing because I really wanted to see the Great Wall and I figured I saw Stonehenge this year, why not add another Wonder to my list?
We were only able to go for four days, but I think it was good because it made sure that we didn't just spend the whole time sleeping, which honestly is how I would have enjoyed spending my time because the work load here in Singapore for teachers varies from inhumanly psychotic to even more inhuman.
Being in Beijing was a very interesting experience for me and it sort of showed me just how not badass I've been in living in Singapore. Singapore has some of the culture, for sure, but it's simply not as incredibly different as it is in China. The challenge for me in being there was both that I don't speak the language and had to rely on Ben, that the culture is so different that I found it sometimes frustrating and that I had quit smoking two weeks before hand so I was already prone to fits of frustration. All that being said, Ben handled it like a champ and we got the chance to eat some fantastic meals and see some beautiful sights.
We went to the Forbidden City, which was the Emperor's Palace back in the Dynasty days and it is huge and beautiful. March is a bit of a crappy time to go I think because the beauty of the gardens is somewhat lessened by crappy weather. That being said, it's good climbing the Great Wall weather because it's not too hot, I don't want to imagine what that would be like in the sweltering sun.
It was a short trip but I did enjoy it and I'm glad to be able to say that I've been to China. I can't say I completely get what all the fuss is about that Ben is so in love with, partially because the culture and language are so different, but the nice thing is that I do notice my comprehension of Mandarin increases every week with me learning a few new words that I can at least identify while people are talking.
Then it was back to Singapore for about a day and off on a two day, one night learning journey with my students to Malaysia. I found the trip really interesting, we went to plantations to see where crops like rubber, pineapple, rice, palm oil and coffee are grown as well as touring Melaka and learning about this incredibly historic city that has been ruled by the Portuguese, Dutch and English leading to some really interesting combinations of food, culture and architecture.
Now it is back to school and more insane work. My contract ends in June which is starting to be really soon and I am working with a few agencies in the UK on finding a drama teaching job to start either in January or September. Depending on what happens with that I am going to see what I can negotiate with the MOE here in terms of extending my contract to finish out the school year in Singapore, or have to leave when it ends.
Either way, I am fairly certain my next step will be living in England, even if only for a short while. I'm not sure still where Ben will be going but it will probably be Canada or China and I'll have to sort out what I do next with that in mind. However, since I was a young girl I've always wanted to live in England and I think it would be a true disservice to myself if I didn't take up that opportunity now while it's so ripe before I come back home or go for a new adventure somewhere else.
If you want to see my pictures from China and Malaysia, there are in my photobucket account, which you can access here:
http://s1105.photobucket.com/albums/h343/Bea_Jolley/Facebook/Beijing%202012/
http://s1105.photobucket.com/albums/h343/Bea_Jolley/Facebook/Learning%20Journey%20Malaysia%202012/
First, Ben and I decided to go to China for a few days over my term break because he's wanted to go back since he left and I've always wanted to see China, especially since knowing Ben and hearing him talk about it so passionately. We decided to go to Beijing because I really wanted to see the Great Wall and I figured I saw Stonehenge this year, why not add another Wonder to my list?
We were only able to go for four days, but I think it was good because it made sure that we didn't just spend the whole time sleeping, which honestly is how I would have enjoyed spending my time because the work load here in Singapore for teachers varies from inhumanly psychotic to even more inhuman.
Being in Beijing was a very interesting experience for me and it sort of showed me just how not badass I've been in living in Singapore. Singapore has some of the culture, for sure, but it's simply not as incredibly different as it is in China. The challenge for me in being there was both that I don't speak the language and had to rely on Ben, that the culture is so different that I found it sometimes frustrating and that I had quit smoking two weeks before hand so I was already prone to fits of frustration. All that being said, Ben handled it like a champ and we got the chance to eat some fantastic meals and see some beautiful sights.
We went to the Forbidden City, which was the Emperor's Palace back in the Dynasty days and it is huge and beautiful. March is a bit of a crappy time to go I think because the beauty of the gardens is somewhat lessened by crappy weather. That being said, it's good climbing the Great Wall weather because it's not too hot, I don't want to imagine what that would be like in the sweltering sun.
It was a short trip but I did enjoy it and I'm glad to be able to say that I've been to China. I can't say I completely get what all the fuss is about that Ben is so in love with, partially because the culture and language are so different, but the nice thing is that I do notice my comprehension of Mandarin increases every week with me learning a few new words that I can at least identify while people are talking.
Then it was back to Singapore for about a day and off on a two day, one night learning journey with my students to Malaysia. I found the trip really interesting, we went to plantations to see where crops like rubber, pineapple, rice, palm oil and coffee are grown as well as touring Melaka and learning about this incredibly historic city that has been ruled by the Portuguese, Dutch and English leading to some really interesting combinations of food, culture and architecture.
Now it is back to school and more insane work. My contract ends in June which is starting to be really soon and I am working with a few agencies in the UK on finding a drama teaching job to start either in January or September. Depending on what happens with that I am going to see what I can negotiate with the MOE here in terms of extending my contract to finish out the school year in Singapore, or have to leave when it ends.
Either way, I am fairly certain my next step will be living in England, even if only for a short while. I'm not sure still where Ben will be going but it will probably be Canada or China and I'll have to sort out what I do next with that in mind. However, since I was a young girl I've always wanted to live in England and I think it would be a true disservice to myself if I didn't take up that opportunity now while it's so ripe before I come back home or go for a new adventure somewhere else.
If you want to see my pictures from China and Malaysia, there are in my photobucket account, which you can access here:
http://s1105.photobucket.com/albums/h343/Bea_Jolley/Facebook/Beijing%202012/
http://s1105.photobucket.com/albums/h343/Bea_Jolley/Facebook/Learning%20Journey%20Malaysia%202012/
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Beijing!
I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while, I'm finding with an added two hours every day of commuting due to the location of my new flat that I am more often than not completely exhausted at the end of the day and I barely have time to think let alone post on my blog.
The good thing is that next week is our March holiday, and even though I long ago learned that they don't believe in holidays in Singapore, I managed to get a flight and hotel booked to go to Beijing with Ben for a few days. I'm going to get to see the Great Wall of China and finally see what all the fuss is about with Ben and his love of China.
I'm looking forward to getting away for a few days and to going on holiday with Ben for the first time.
On the job front, things are intense and busy and exhausting. My contract ends in June and I am supposed to hear from the Ministry about a contract renewal offer in April. In the meantime I am exploring drama jobs in high schools in London. I started out the whole overseas teaching thing wanting to go to England so I thought I owe it to myself to continue to look at what options would be possible there. Now that I've been able to actually go to London I know that I would love living there for a year or two so we'll see what happens. I'm also thinking about possibly working in Beijing, my friend Iain is looking at jobs there and Ben might like to go to school in China so that would be a way for us to be together. That being said, I'll see how I like China while I'm there and if I think it is somewhere that I could see myself living.
Ok, I'm going to go continue relaxing and enjoying my Sunday, as I had to work on Saturday and even though Monday is the first day of our "holiday" I have an all day meeting for the English department to attend tomorrow. Oh well, Tuesday morning we leave for China!
The good thing is that next week is our March holiday, and even though I long ago learned that they don't believe in holidays in Singapore, I managed to get a flight and hotel booked to go to Beijing with Ben for a few days. I'm going to get to see the Great Wall of China and finally see what all the fuss is about with Ben and his love of China.
I'm looking forward to getting away for a few days and to going on holiday with Ben for the first time.
On the job front, things are intense and busy and exhausting. My contract ends in June and I am supposed to hear from the Ministry about a contract renewal offer in April. In the meantime I am exploring drama jobs in high schools in London. I started out the whole overseas teaching thing wanting to go to England so I thought I owe it to myself to continue to look at what options would be possible there. Now that I've been able to actually go to London I know that I would love living there for a year or two so we'll see what happens. I'm also thinking about possibly working in Beijing, my friend Iain is looking at jobs there and Ben might like to go to school in China so that would be a way for us to be together. That being said, I'll see how I like China while I'm there and if I think it is somewhere that I could see myself living.
Ok, I'm going to go continue relaxing and enjoying my Sunday, as I had to work on Saturday and even though Monday is the first day of our "holiday" I have an all day meeting for the English department to attend tomorrow. Oh well, Tuesday morning we leave for China!
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Birthday on the Other Side of the World
1: Mom, I don't know if you read my blog, but I just want you to know I think about you a lot and I miss you. I hope that you are well and that your health is good. I hope that the winter hasn't been too cold for you and that I might hear from you sometime. I love you.
2: As some of you may know, my birthday was last week. As a February baby, it's very strange to celebrate your birthday in the sun. And the heat. It honestly didn't really feel like my birthday at all. On the weekend we went and got some Indian food with some of my friends here in Singapore and on Monday my students brought a cake to school which was really sweet of them. Having facebook that students are on, they all knew it was my birthday and I was hearing "happy birthday Ms. Jolley!!!" everywhere I went all week.
The looming question continues to be what do I do next, and I still don't have an answer for you. I know that I like Singapore, I know that I don't like being apart from Ben. I know that I like my job, I know that my job as it is now isn't what I started out wanting to do (teaching drama), I know that there are drama companies I could work with as a trainer, and I know that they also aren't what I'm looking for because I would be working with babies and younger kids. I know that International schools pay well, I also know that most of their hiring fairs were in January and February already.
At my school, people want to know if I'm staying and I can still honestly say I have no idea. I am looking into jobs at international schools, and looking for drama jobs, but I keep seeing mostly english positions, which are still not doing what I want to be doing but that seem like they would be in a more conducive environment to the kind of teaching I like. I know that working at an IB school would be a good next step to develop my resume and get a broader range of experience.
If I had to tell you what my perfect next year would be, it would look like this:
Ben would be in Singapore, or I would be with him in Canada.
I would be teaching drama to an age group I like working with.
I would be making more money than I am now and living somewhere nice and comfortable.
Are all of these things possible? Hopefully, it's just a question of how and what needs to happen to get there. I have options, I can stay with my school until the school year ends, which would take me to November or December, I can finish in June and look for a job that starts in September, I can go home and look for jobs from there or I can stay here and look for jobs from here. Seeing as I have somewhere to live and a way to pay the bills here, here seems like the better idea of those two options.
What I know is that I miss teaching drama like a hole in my heart, and I miss being creative in that way and helping young people to be creative and find their voices. I am still doing a bit of drama here and I am teaching the DEP program at my school, but it's not the same as coming in every day and working with drama as your main subject.
I will keep you all posted as time goes on and options open up. My Dad gave me the good advice that to negotiate a contract I need to be in a position of strength, and that usually comes from having a job. I'm in a much better place here, employed to look for a job than I will be if I go back home and I'm under-employed in Canada and trying to make ends meet. Better to take an opportunity because it speaks to me than because I am desperate. And so I begin.
Also, I am hoping to plan a trip to China in March with Ben, and I'm going to Malacca with my students in March as well, so I will hopefully have some interesting stuff to tell you and pictures to show you all after those two things happen.
For now, I'm super happy to have Ben here with me when I go to sleep at night. That's worth so so much, it's impossible to really explain the difference that makes from 10 months of long distance.
2: As some of you may know, my birthday was last week. As a February baby, it's very strange to celebrate your birthday in the sun. And the heat. It honestly didn't really feel like my birthday at all. On the weekend we went and got some Indian food with some of my friends here in Singapore and on Monday my students brought a cake to school which was really sweet of them. Having facebook that students are on, they all knew it was my birthday and I was hearing "happy birthday Ms. Jolley!!!" everywhere I went all week.
The looming question continues to be what do I do next, and I still don't have an answer for you. I know that I like Singapore, I know that I don't like being apart from Ben. I know that I like my job, I know that my job as it is now isn't what I started out wanting to do (teaching drama), I know that there are drama companies I could work with as a trainer, and I know that they also aren't what I'm looking for because I would be working with babies and younger kids. I know that International schools pay well, I also know that most of their hiring fairs were in January and February already.
At my school, people want to know if I'm staying and I can still honestly say I have no idea. I am looking into jobs at international schools, and looking for drama jobs, but I keep seeing mostly english positions, which are still not doing what I want to be doing but that seem like they would be in a more conducive environment to the kind of teaching I like. I know that working at an IB school would be a good next step to develop my resume and get a broader range of experience.
If I had to tell you what my perfect next year would be, it would look like this:
Ben would be in Singapore, or I would be with him in Canada.
I would be teaching drama to an age group I like working with.
I would be making more money than I am now and living somewhere nice and comfortable.
Are all of these things possible? Hopefully, it's just a question of how and what needs to happen to get there. I have options, I can stay with my school until the school year ends, which would take me to November or December, I can finish in June and look for a job that starts in September, I can go home and look for jobs from there or I can stay here and look for jobs from here. Seeing as I have somewhere to live and a way to pay the bills here, here seems like the better idea of those two options.
What I know is that I miss teaching drama like a hole in my heart, and I miss being creative in that way and helping young people to be creative and find their voices. I am still doing a bit of drama here and I am teaching the DEP program at my school, but it's not the same as coming in every day and working with drama as your main subject.
I will keep you all posted as time goes on and options open up. My Dad gave me the good advice that to negotiate a contract I need to be in a position of strength, and that usually comes from having a job. I'm in a much better place here, employed to look for a job than I will be if I go back home and I'm under-employed in Canada and trying to make ends meet. Better to take an opportunity because it speaks to me than because I am desperate. And so I begin.
Also, I am hoping to plan a trip to China in March with Ben, and I'm going to Malacca with my students in March as well, so I will hopefully have some interesting stuff to tell you and pictures to show you all after those two things happen.
For now, I'm super happy to have Ben here with me when I go to sleep at night. That's worth so so much, it's impossible to really explain the difference that makes from 10 months of long distance.
Saturday, January 28, 2012
Good Night Tampines, Good Morning Bedok
Ben and I have finally moved to a new flat! Yay!
It was a bit of a pain dealing with agents and finding a flat that had air con, internet and would allow an unmarried couple to live there (sometimes it feels like we're in the dark ages here, I swear...) but we did it!
One interesting story that occurred on the way:
In Singapore you can't just rent out a flat, you have to have an agent who represents you and finds you a flat, and the people who are looking for a new tenant for their flat has to hire an agent to find people to rent it. It's all a very silly system in my mind and it means that you end up paying someone hundreds of dollars that you would really rather have spent on buying shiny IKEA things for said new flat, but when in Rome.
So, we found this possible new flat and went to sign the papers. The agent representing the landlords of this flat was a total knob. Super rude, really standoffish and trying to constantly insinuate that our agent was incapable of doing her job (by the way, our agent was my roommate from my previous flat). It got to the point where he was arguing with my agent about some silly paper that the landlord needed to sign for her company and everyone started yelling in Chinese.
This is the part where having a boyfriend who speaks Chinese comes in handy. The agent was interrupting me at one point and that was when shit got real. Ben started yelling at him in Chinese, which I don't speak but I understand enough of to know that he was telling the guy that he speaks Chinese too and that he understood what was happening and that this guy was being a dick essentially. Super hot. Ben FTW.
At the end of it all, we've found a really nice flat in Bedok. We are sharing a flat with an older Chinese married couple and they seem like just the nicest people you could ever meet. The wife made us food a few times already and the husband has been showing us how to use everything and where all of the circuit breakers are and such, and all of the books on their shelves are things like "Living a Life of Happiness" and "The Way of Happiness" or stuff like that. There is also a really neat Buddha shrine. I feel like living with a peaceful couple who are interested in finding happiness and cooking with you is pretty damn nice.
The frustrating part is that now I have to get up way earlier in the morning to get the bus and MRT to school and now I have no idea what buses to take from all of my usual places in Singapore so it's a whole new learning journey of getting lost and confused to find my way around again. On the brightside, all of that is a lot easier to do when you have a partner in being lost. Also, an iPhone.
It was a bit of a pain dealing with agents and finding a flat that had air con, internet and would allow an unmarried couple to live there (sometimes it feels like we're in the dark ages here, I swear...) but we did it!
One interesting story that occurred on the way:
In Singapore you can't just rent out a flat, you have to have an agent who represents you and finds you a flat, and the people who are looking for a new tenant for their flat has to hire an agent to find people to rent it. It's all a very silly system in my mind and it means that you end up paying someone hundreds of dollars that you would really rather have spent on buying shiny IKEA things for said new flat, but when in Rome.
So, we found this possible new flat and went to sign the papers. The agent representing the landlords of this flat was a total knob. Super rude, really standoffish and trying to constantly insinuate that our agent was incapable of doing her job (by the way, our agent was my roommate from my previous flat). It got to the point where he was arguing with my agent about some silly paper that the landlord needed to sign for her company and everyone started yelling in Chinese.
This is the part where having a boyfriend who speaks Chinese comes in handy. The agent was interrupting me at one point and that was when shit got real. Ben started yelling at him in Chinese, which I don't speak but I understand enough of to know that he was telling the guy that he speaks Chinese too and that he understood what was happening and that this guy was being a dick essentially. Super hot. Ben FTW.
At the end of it all, we've found a really nice flat in Bedok. We are sharing a flat with an older Chinese married couple and they seem like just the nicest people you could ever meet. The wife made us food a few times already and the husband has been showing us how to use everything and where all of the circuit breakers are and such, and all of the books on their shelves are things like "Living a Life of Happiness" and "The Way of Happiness" or stuff like that. There is also a really neat Buddha shrine. I feel like living with a peaceful couple who are interested in finding happiness and cooking with you is pretty damn nice.
The frustrating part is that now I have to get up way earlier in the morning to get the bus and MRT to school and now I have no idea what buses to take from all of my usual places in Singapore so it's a whole new learning journey of getting lost and confused to find my way around again. On the brightside, all of that is a lot easier to do when you have a partner in being lost. Also, an iPhone.
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Just to add some stuff to the delirious writing of yesterday:
Having Ben here with me in Singapore is awesome. The feeling of content and happiness I have when I come home from school is hard to even explain. To go from 9 months of long distance, co-ordinating phone calls across time differences, feeling alone, trying to relate to each other's very different life experiences to having someone here with you, sharing dinner together and telling each other about our respective days at school is like going from having a large knife in your arm to being massaged.
Also, going from entering a totally foreign school system in the middle of the year where everyone speaks differently and there is an acronym for everything to starting a fresh school year with colleagues and students that you know and a system you now understand is a similar experience.
In short, my life quality is improving drastically. Add to that my end of year bonus still in my account and the security of knowing you have enough money for whatever you might need, even if it were an emergency flight home and I'm a pretty happy lady these days.
Sure, I'm exhausted, but that's just this week. I'm really looking forward to the next 6 months and the challenges and treats that lie ahead for Ben and I.
Ask me what's happening in June, and I've got no clue, but for now, I'm fairly happy.
:)
Having Ben here with me in Singapore is awesome. The feeling of content and happiness I have when I come home from school is hard to even explain. To go from 9 months of long distance, co-ordinating phone calls across time differences, feeling alone, trying to relate to each other's very different life experiences to having someone here with you, sharing dinner together and telling each other about our respective days at school is like going from having a large knife in your arm to being massaged.
Also, going from entering a totally foreign school system in the middle of the year where everyone speaks differently and there is an acronym for everything to starting a fresh school year with colleagues and students that you know and a system you now understand is a similar experience.
In short, my life quality is improving drastically. Add to that my end of year bonus still in my account and the security of knowing you have enough money for whatever you might need, even if it were an emergency flight home and I'm a pretty happy lady these days.
Sure, I'm exhausted, but that's just this week. I'm really looking forward to the next 6 months and the challenges and treats that lie ahead for Ben and I.
Ask me what's happening in June, and I've got no clue, but for now, I'm fairly happy.
:)
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
AH! Start of the School Year!
I'm sorry I haven't been updating much but that is largely due to the fact that I am running around madly working as well as adjusting to having Ben living with me and finding a new flat for the two of us so I just haven't had much time.
The last two weeks have been a whirlwind as the school year starts again and I get my head around my new students, new classes, new routines and living with someone when I've been living alone for the last 9 months in a sad little bedroom with some older ladies.
I am implementing lots of routines and things with my students this year because this is my first start of a school year with classes all my own so I'm testing things out to see if they work. This process is good but also exhausting because it creates a lot of work in the process of trying to ultimately cut down on the work that I have to do chasing kids around.
It's also exhausting because you are getting to meet all of your students, all 200 or so of them, little people who you don't know yet but you will spend lots and lots of time with, all with names that are hard to pronounce and special things about them that you want to get to know and learn so that you can be a better teacher to them. It's exciting, and interesting, and often funny because of the questions they ask, but also exhausting.
Add to that adjusting to sharing my life with Ben who is living here now and sorting out our own routines and ways of sharing space (we are both only children...so it's not always the easiest thing) and you have a zombie in the shape of a teacher. Despite all of that, one of my students wrote that today he learned that Ms. Jolley is hyper. Awesome :)
I've got this new thing I hand out where my kids write what they are wondering about, what they learned and what they are struggling with for every class. Some of my favorite things so far are:
I am wondering if the universe is infinite? (The next class) I am still wondering if it is infinite?
I am wondering when I am going to die :) (smiley face not mine....:S)
I am wondering if all of the grown ups have facebook?
I am struggling with Chinese. It is hard to learn.
I am wondering is Ms. Jolley likes Justin Bieber.
I am wondering why she came from Canada?
I am wondering how much water Ms. Jolley is going to drink today. (I had a flu and a cough so I was drinking a lot of water that day)
Also, I have given a few classes the chance to ask me whatever questions that they want, these are some highlights:
Why is your hair that weird colour?
Are you married?
How old are you?
Is it cold in Canada?
Why did you come here?
What books do you like?
My kids are adorable. My sec 1 students are 12, so they are precocious and hyper and fun to teach.
Also, Ben and I found a new flat that has a room that is much bigger, we move in a week or two. I am really looking forward to that!
My brain has stalled, so I am going to sign off for now. I just thought you'd all like to know I'm not dead, just super super busy.
The last two weeks have been a whirlwind as the school year starts again and I get my head around my new students, new classes, new routines and living with someone when I've been living alone for the last 9 months in a sad little bedroom with some older ladies.
I am implementing lots of routines and things with my students this year because this is my first start of a school year with classes all my own so I'm testing things out to see if they work. This process is good but also exhausting because it creates a lot of work in the process of trying to ultimately cut down on the work that I have to do chasing kids around.
It's also exhausting because you are getting to meet all of your students, all 200 or so of them, little people who you don't know yet but you will spend lots and lots of time with, all with names that are hard to pronounce and special things about them that you want to get to know and learn so that you can be a better teacher to them. It's exciting, and interesting, and often funny because of the questions they ask, but also exhausting.
Add to that adjusting to sharing my life with Ben who is living here now and sorting out our own routines and ways of sharing space (we are both only children...so it's not always the easiest thing) and you have a zombie in the shape of a teacher. Despite all of that, one of my students wrote that today he learned that Ms. Jolley is hyper. Awesome :)
I've got this new thing I hand out where my kids write what they are wondering about, what they learned and what they are struggling with for every class. Some of my favorite things so far are:
I am wondering if the universe is infinite? (The next class) I am still wondering if it is infinite?
I am wondering when I am going to die :) (smiley face not mine....:S)
I am wondering if all of the grown ups have facebook?
I am struggling with Chinese. It is hard to learn.
I am wondering is Ms. Jolley likes Justin Bieber.
I am wondering why she came from Canada?
I am wondering how much water Ms. Jolley is going to drink today. (I had a flu and a cough so I was drinking a lot of water that day)
Also, I have given a few classes the chance to ask me whatever questions that they want, these are some highlights:
Why is your hair that weird colour?
Are you married?
How old are you?
Is it cold in Canada?
Why did you come here?
What books do you like?
My kids are adorable. My sec 1 students are 12, so they are precocious and hyper and fun to teach.
Also, Ben and I found a new flat that has a room that is much bigger, we move in a week or two. I am really looking forward to that!
My brain has stalled, so I am going to sign off for now. I just thought you'd all like to know I'm not dead, just super super busy.
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