Sunday, April 22, 2012

Hello dear blog.

It's been a while, and for that I apologise. I've been agonising over the decision about what to do next. This week I got my contract renewal offer for Singapore with a window of only 5 days to decide what to do, so I'm sure you can imagine there has been a lot of angst.

On one hand, a big part of me wants to finally be able to go home. I miss Canada, and my friends and my family. I miss my country and Shopper's Drug Mart and poutine. I have been growing increasingly more fong of the idea of being able to spend a summer at home and to be able to take the plane trip home with Ben in June when his course ends. However, pragmatism has won over idealism. (I know, this doesn't sound much like me.)

Working and teaching in Singapore has been a fantastic opportunity for my first teaching year. If I'd stayed home, I would have spent this year in all likelihood battling it out for supply teaching, or LTOs, and more than likely still working at Starbucks and hating my life.

Instead, I've had the experience of living in Asia, as well as the chance to travel to Hong Kong, Malaysia, China, England and Indonesia as well as of course, Singapore. I've also been able to have a mentor and the benefit of being in the Skilled Teacher program that has taught me so many valuable teaching skills to better my pedagogy and manage my classrooms.

The few things that are really missing for me are of course being home and being able to teach drama. Which is what I started out this whole teaching thing to do in the first place.

That all being said, I know I have mentioned before that I am looking to England to be my next move. However, I don't have a position there yet as the main hiring round for September happens in May.

I've decided to finish out this school year. I don't like starting something and not seeing it through and I've done so much work already with my Drama students for their production this year, and with my form class as well as my subject classes that a part of me would not feel right about leaving.

Also, the idea of leaving a job without having a new one to replace it just seems silly in this economy. I put my hopes on England once before and I was let down, sorely. I'm coming at it again this time with more experience and hopefully more to recommend me for a position as well as the experience of living abroad.

So, it looks like I will be in Singapore until December, unless a wonderful job in England comes my way that starts in September. This means that in June when Ben leaves, I will not be on the plane with him.

It was incredibly hard living here without him before and I think it will be even more painful having had the chance to share 6 months together and then to go back to it.

But, I'm nothing if not strong and I've got some good friends here. I also want to take as many opportunities to travel in Asia as I can with the time that I have left.

I will of course keep you all posted on how things develop. I wish I could be writing some inspiring missive about how I'm going for my dreams and taking a leap, but everyone I talk to who's working in teaching tells me to hold on to any position I have like grim death and I'm inclined to agree with them. Maybe being an adult means having to do things like this, but hey, I have a good job in a great country so I really shouldn't complain about staying for a while longer, right?

Next step, plan a trip to Batam for the weekend again because there's a lovely beach resort I went to with some friends that Ben and I are going to return to for the upcoming long weekend, and plan a trip to Japan for Ben and I before he goes back to Canada in June. At least there's that to look forward to, and really, how many people can say that?