Wednesday, September 27, 2017

Dublin (Better Late Than Never)

It's been a long time now since my trip to Dublin, but it was the end of a great journey and I've been loathe to write about it because it feels like closing the book and putting it back on the shelf. But, all good things come to an end, as do all bad things, so I must finish this round of my travel blogging adventures.

I flew out of Milan and bade farewell to Rafael, feeling somewhat disappointed in him and myself for the lacklustre evening we had on Friday which was most likely fueled by my own emotional and physical exhaustion. Either way, I got on the Aer Lingus flight after a wild battle with a terribly organized airport situation and a teeming hoarde of Italian high schoolers on an English trip with a harried instructor desperately attempting to herd the kids like unruly sheep. Flashes of many professional experiences flitted through my mind as I felt once again the incredible lightness of travelling alone cascade over me.

Landing in Dublin I was overcome with the incredible green beauty of the place, and excitement at being in a country I've always wanted to visit washed over me. Navigating the bus system with a broken bag and a malfunctioning card loader was not the best time, but I got there in the end and that was the important thing.

Coco had found a beautiful Airbnb with a lovely family and a gorgeous backyard and we chatted and caught up and then we went out to the downtown area to see what we could see. I was freezing my ass off because I had only packed for record breaking heat in Italy, and learned the hard way that next year a jacket and a scarf are required, especially if I go back to France and Dublin like I intend to. So we hunted down a scarf and then some Moroccan food, which was insanely good and which I've wanted to try for a long time. The restaurant was decorated like the inside of a silk tent, and there was a belly dancer which was awesome! It was most of all nice to be with Coco again and to reconnect with home.

Dublin was the perfect was to get re-acclimated to English life, and cold weather. We got a Pumpkin Spice latte (there are not Starbucks in Italy aside from a project one in Milan I think that I never found) and bought me a scarf and went about admiring the local scenery because never in my life have I seen so many beautiful men.

We met up with a guy Coco had met the night before who turned out to be a weirdo, and we escaped him when I very tall and beautiful Frenchman was so drunk he fell like a tree onto his perfect face and busted it open. Coco and I being who we are, we went to get him first aid help and once we saw that his bleeding was under control and his friends were there, we took the chance to dip and escape the weird dude.

Walking down the street, Coco heard some great music coming out of a bar and as we stopped a crowd of fit lads in front encouraged us to come in. Hearing our accent, they asked us where we were from and soon we were in the company of a crowd of lovely lads who had lived in Toronto for a few years and love Canada and were awesome. The band, who were awesome, were called Dirty, Sexy Money and they were lit. We chatted with some of them after and later on at a club while we were dancing we ended up dancing with the lead singer.

On our way home we observed the local drunk Irish folk in their natural habitat, wasted at the Tesco, and Rob helped pick out the best Irish junk food for me to eat at the shop including Bacon Crisps that were lit. We also watched a van roll up with about 8 cops in it, all of them rushing into the shop to arrest a dude who we watched pull sweets and candies out of his jacket like a clown car. It was highly entertaining and everything you want Ireland to be.

The next day we went to the coast and saw the sea and went around downtown again and decided we love Dublin to bits and have to come back again for longer. I decided if I ever choose to take a husband, I will retire for a month to Dublin and after that period of time I will likely have found one. We also got claddaugh rings that we love to pieces. I was tuckered out and headed home early so that Coco could meet up with Rob again and they could have some time together, plus we had to be up at 4:30am to get our flight home and I was at the end of my capacities to live out of a suitcase and walk around all day.

Our flight was nice, we had a stop over in Newfoundland which was also a nice way to slowly dip my toe back into being home because people there sound kind of Irish and it was actually nice to see a Tim Horton's. I am a stereotype.

Home was lovely, my cats were happy to see me in a healthy way that didn't feel like they were panicking about me being gone and my bed and sushi were exactly as good as I knew they would be when I got back.

Already planning next year with at least 4 days in Dublin on the way to Europe, so I will be full of energy and the required exuberance to properly make use of the greatness that Dublin has on offer. And when I do, I will resume this travel blog for you all! In the meantime, I am back to work and school and paying off/saving up for travel!

Tuesday, September 12, 2017

Mestre

I am writing this from the floor of the gate at Linate airport in Milan, waiting for my flight to Dublin to start boarding and wiping tears from my cheeks as I get ready to bid farewell to beautiful Italy. It’s hard for me to put into words the emotions that are washing through me, but mostly I think I could some them up with gratitude.

I have been tested and exhausted by the last two weeks of camp, but I have also had wonderful connections with people and the chance to use my skills as a teacher in new ways and really help and share with people in ways that I hope will be helpful. I haven’t written because I have been absorbed in the work and working with younger kids is supremely exhausting. The last two weeks I was in a camp in Mestre near Venice and it was a delightful, stressful mess. There were a few very strong personalities in the tutor group and so I decided to take a step back and shut my mouth most of the time, waiting to use my currency when it mattered the most rather than throwing my weight around for no good reason. Watching the others, I see that this is a gift that wisdom and age bring us and I feel grateful to have made it to this point in my life that I have learned how to shut my mouth and let the stress go away when it isn’t there to serve my needs or those around me.

In the last week of camp I started to make friends with one of the other tutors and I think I’ve found this trip that I can be friends with people who are 18 and 19, which I usually feel I can’t because I teach them, but it’s been nice not to have the teacher thing in between us and to be able to have good conversations and fun times with people at that age and be forgiving of the fact that they don’t know a lot of the stuff yet without being a judgemental asshole. My friend at camp told me I’m “safe” which is Brit talk for cool and not an asshole, and he said I’m the first 30 year old person he’s been able to be friends with and not feel like they are discounting him because of his age. He helped me a lot actually and we talked about some things that he helped me get some perspective on. I also had the idea that at the end of our camp we should sing “Hello Goodbye” by the Beatles because it’s simple and it was in my head after he had been singing Beatles songs and he went home that night and wrote out new lyrics about all the people at the camp. I was so stoked on his song and the camp directors decided we should do it. It was stressful, and the other tutors were negative and shitty about it at first, but in the end it turned out amazingly well and I think he learned a little bit more that he can do amazing things and that he’s got a lot of wonderful talent to give the world.

On Wednesday night the helpers (high school kids that get assigned to us to help in our classes) invited us to go to a silent dance party, where you wear headphones and pick out of three DJ’s channels the music you want to listen to. A bunch of the tutors said they didn’t want to go because it was late and a weeknight but I said we only have a few more days left in Italy and we won’t remember the nights we went to bed early 10 years from now. So Rob and I went to the supermarket and bough cheap and terrible boxed wine, and met up in the park and sat on a bench and played a horrible drinking game called the Bus. It was a lot of fun and getting to know him was wonderful, I think it helped me heal one of the last parts of the broken feelings I’ve had since this last year. Then our helpers met us on their bikes to show us the way to the old fort by the water where the party was. It was insane and so much fun and terribly dangerous drunkenly biking through the streets of Mestre but we were managing until we went onto a dark gravel pathway at which point I felt my equilibrium shift and felt the deep knowledge that I was destined to go ass over teakettle. This wouldn’t have sucked as badly if it hasn’t been directly into a bramble bush, so I was picking thorns out of my wounds for the next day or so, but I got up laughing and got back on my bike and chalked it up to battle scars. We had so much insane fun dancing around at the party, they were playing electroswing and Elvis and 90’s music and Rob and Jess and Monique and I were just crazy dancing all over the place, the helpers were having a blast and it was fabulous. I lost my little black bag of cosmetics but I felt sure I would find it again and Carla knew where it was and Rob helped me find home and biked back with me and it was an exhilarating adventure that I will remember forever.

The final show was a day where everyone stressed out, but I had made a film with my kids so I took them out to the side of the school in our little secondary garden and we played games all day and they taught me a volleyball like game and I used my body again like I used to when I was a kid and I didn’t feel sure that I wasn’t able to anymore. Rob and I had played basketball and I was actually good and I jumped rope and I ran around and I have been carrying my luggage and I am strong as hell right now and it’s a beautiful feeling. I’ve lost a bunch of weight, my pants are loose and I feel like I found my way back to my body again after being disconnected from it for a long time. Being around kids can do that for you, you remember what it was like when you could just do anything and your legs would bend however you needed them to and you could do a cartwheel because it never occurred to you to think you couldn’t. When you were just your body and there wasn’t the division between who you are and who you want to be, or need to be, or hope you can become one day so you can be an ok human and not a disgusting blob like the world has told you that you are.


My flight is boarding soon, and I’m so happy to see Coco. I spent the night in Milan at Rafaelle’s houe and it was sort of like a circle, coming back around the to the first nights I spent in Italy on my way back. I’m very excited for Dublin, and I am very excited for home. And I have loved Italy and will forever be grateful I had this chance to find my way back to a better me that can trust herself and is strong and powerful and lovable.